“Elon Musk”, the Onion:
I spent nine hours on Twitter today. For a few of those hours, I was reading and responding to tweets while on my private jet being whisked from Austin to San Francisco and back again. Picture me, if you will, sitting in a comfortable seat on my own airplane, zooming through the clouds from one important meeting to another. I should be sipping a cocktail and loving life, right? Instead, I’m up there growing more and more depressed as I read hundreds—nay, thousands—of replies, quote tweets, and subtweets from people insulting me and my projects. Why? Why do people do this? Why don’t you like me?
All I want is for you to be nice to me. Please be nice to me. Please be my friend. Will you be my friend?
You can even just pretend to be my friend, if you want.
He makes a compelling case.